I Spit On Your Grave: 25 Out Of 100 Stars

This would be the just released remake.

Listen, I'm up for any movie centered around a sadistic gang rape of a hot chick, unfortunately this clunker lacks any heart, soul, innovation or anything resembling originality. Instead we're treated to a long preamble before all hell breaks loose. The preamble would be fine if it was used to do anything to make us care about the characters. Unfortunately we just get montage shots of the heroin/victim running, drinking, writing, etc. At no point is any attempt made to show us who this girl is or make us care about her anymore than we would any other woman in her situation, she's a blank slate through the entire movie.

The attackers meanwhile are written as thinly as possible. They're rednecks who hate cock teasing city cunts. No further depth to their characters is attempted.

So then we're treated to the long attack scene that it seems the film makers hoped would garner them lots of attention for being edgy or something, but really it's no more graphic or upsetting than Last House On The Left or any other rape centric movie. It does do a great job of making the scene last and last and last. Never doing much more than continuing, it almost becomes boring.

So our heroin gets away from her attackers in a pretty ridiculous sequence that looks like it had about 5 seconds of thought put into it, and then a month later she begins her revenge. This is where the movie really starts to fall off the rails as far as coherency is concerned. We're never shown how or where she's been all month. We know that her friends haven't heard from her. Maybe she was ninja training, because she easily outwits and outplays all of her attackers one by one until she has her revenge. She even apparently becomes a teacher in town at some point, it just gets so ridiculous.

Besides the bad pacing and flimsy story, none of the characters save for the sheriff are anything above average. The chick has zero presence and never really had me feeling bad for her plight, happy for her revenge or anything. She's just there.

And lastly let me say to any potential film makers reading this. If your movie is not about a retard, DO NOT PUT A RETARD IN YOUR MOVIE. They bog down scenes, distract the viewer and are not fucking needed.

I spit on this movie.