The 10 points is only because at times it borders on "so bad, it's somewhat interesting". I mean, you watch it and you wonder what the fuck the writers and makers of it intended it to be.
For those unfamiliar with the series, the original Wrong Turn was a perfectly acceptable little horror film that starred Eliza Dushku. The second one had no Eliza Dushku, and was the movie going equivalent of prison rape. Just beyond awful. So imagine my surprise when I saw that they had decided to make a third movie. Not one to pre judge, I was ready to give it a shot. I mean, let's be fair, the basic premise of a bunch of homicidal, backwoods mutant cannibal people is a pretty good starting spot.
Unfortunately for the viewer, the makers of the film decided to pretty much forgo the formula and give us a Lifetime movie.
I was actually excited when the film began with 2 young couples rafting down the river in the familiar backwoods. Cool, I thought to myself, some naked chicks, some chase, some gore, pretty nice setup. But then I realized the chicks weren't that hot, the dialog was pretty shitty and the mutants makeup was hilariously bad. I mean, it looked like a rubber mask for fuck sakes. Anyhoo, this all turned out to be preamble, as 3 of the 4 kids are killed, revealing the god awful CGI that would be on display for the rest of the film.
Now the film moves on to the main story that starts in a prison. The leader of the Mexican gang, who is so barely Spanish he might as well be Martin Sheen, has cut a deal with his nemesis, the leader of the Aryans, who is not quite buff or menacing enough to be believable. The prisoners are set to be transferred, and the Mexican has payed the Aryan to have his boys hijack the bus and help them escape. Boy, that was a run on sentence. Anyway, besides our 2 baddies we have 2 young cops, one white, one black, I'll let you guess who lasts longer. There's a scene where the white cop is introduced to an undercover agent posing as an inmate who'll be on the bus in case anything bad happens. The warden also announces that they're moving the time of the transfer up to throw a wrench in any potential hijack plans. This scene is interesting for 2 reasons. Firstly the undercover cop plays no further part in the story, and secondly, as they're getting on the bus the Aryan tells the Mexican not to worry because he's gotten word out to his boys about the schedule change. Making of course the entire previous scene worthless.
So these hardcore lifer inmates are loaded on a single bus with 3 cops, 1 of whom is driving, and no caravan of any sort. Luckily the warden has also remapped the drive so that it takes them into the middle of nowhere. But that's ok, becuase the white cop is from that part of the middle of nowhere, so everything will be ok.
There's a bunch of useless shit including a sheriff and his female deputy out there in that middle of nowhere. The Sheriff of course knows the white cop, and they have a nice reunion when the bus stops at the police station, err, cabin, to let the prisoners pee.
So after all this useless, horrid dialog and back story, the bus gets back on the road, and by hook or mutant crook, something bad happens to the bus, leaving all it's passengers abandoned down in the woods. For the next 10 hours or so we're treated to walking. Walking. Walking. Walking and talking. And talking. They threaten each other, they stumble on an old armored car, that of course is still filled with money. They walk and talk and threaten and repeat the same conversations over and over and over. All the inmates have guns, they all threaten to shoot each other, they all argue over the money, they all talk and talk and talk and never do anything.
Of course they stumble upon a mutant and his kid, who by the way are the only mutants in the movie whereas the previous film was full of them. Maybe they only had 2 masks. The inmates kill the mutant kid which sets up them being hunted by the irate dad. The crew is joined by the lone survivor from the movies opening scene, a plain, below average actress who cozies right up to our plain, below average acting lead. Anyway, shit happens, people act and do the dumbest things. People get killed and nobody reacts in a normal way. It's just all so insipidly tedious.
There are multiple false finishes which was aggravating me because I was ready to go do something more exciting like drive a nail into my cock.
The best part of this movie comes when we're treated the Sheriffs female deputy talking on the phone and I noticed she had really gorgeous eyes. That 10 seconds was awesome. The other hour and a half, not so much.
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